Theoria

Dick “Geriatric” Cheney “mistakes” a 78 year old millionaire lawyer for a “quail” and shoots him in the head with a shot-gun. Says a spokeswoman, “Fortunately, the vice-president has got a lot of medical people around him and so they were right there and probably more cautious than we would have been. The vice-president has got an ambulance on call, so the ambulance came.”

Readers will certainly recall the chapter, “Q is for Quail”, from George W. Bush’s Amazing Alphabet Book of the Contemporary World, or Al-Qaedas All Around (illustrated by Paul Wolfowitz).  The chapter, like the chapter on democracy in Spinoza’s Political Treatise, strangely trails off: “See Dick shoot the Quail, all 400 of them! Quail are tiny, chicken-y birds with lots and lots of little bones and no meat, but Dick loves to…”